so, tomorrow is my last day home before the big PA trip, i can't believe i'm actually going, i'm so excited.  it really doesn't seem like i'm going to get to see my friends in a couple of days.  it's weird, since i've been here for months without them, to be going to see them again, i hope it's not all weird like because of it.  for them it might not be, because they all have other friends, but me, all i've got is them, and a handfull of people who stuck with me even though i'm a nomad.  i hope things will be a lot like they were before, and also that i'll be able to carry some of the perspective i've gained through this summer with me.  not just now either, but for the rest of the year. 
i'm feeling super independent lately, and weirdly at the same time, i've been thinking about what i want in a significant other a lot too.  i'm making a list in my head, and it's getting rather long, perhaps i'm a little picky?  it's kind of fun though, it reminds me of when we were younger, on the bus we used to make lists of things like that.  it's little things

like in high fidelity (sorry i use it for everything, but i've seen it a million zillion times and read the book, so it's floating around in there a lot)  when rob says that he is thinking of making a mix tape for laura with songs that he thinks would make her happy, not songs he would want but ones she would

or that i would want someone who connected with me in the same way i'd want to connect with him

or that he would fight to keep me around,

and he'd want to tell me all about anything he could think of, and he'd sing to me, and play games with me, and teach me things, and compliment me, but not too much, and i'd feel like we liked each other the same amount, and he'd look to me for advice, and be there for me when i needed it, and like some of the same movies and books, and be there when i totally screw up my life and need some support getting it all back together and tons and tons of other things, in the past i've had a lot of these things, some from different people, but i'd like them all put together into one person, that would be nice. 

anyway, i haven't packed yet, and i'm going to go chase fireflies with my sister

i'll be home in a week, oh that sounds so nice.